I think I figured it out

Well part of it anyways. I think I have figured out why my emotions are going crazy as all get out right now.

Rob will be home for R&R in less than 30 days. And while I am thrilled about it, at the same time I am dreading it. Part of me wishes he wasn't taking leave, but I know in the end, I'll be glad he did. After leave, we'll have about 9 more months to go, I was so hoping he would get leave later in the deployment, like after the holidays. Thing is, the boys and are used to him not being around, as sad as that sounds, but since he'll be home before the holidays, I'm afraid we'll be right back in the funk of trying to get our schedule going after he has left, yet again.

And the second part of why I think I'm going a little crazy. All the wives in my neighborhood are preparing for homecoming. Now, why I know they have done their time, its just going to be weird being the only wife on the block still having a deployed husband.


For 18 days, Rob will be home, and we'll be a family again. But it will be short lived. I'm no more going to get used to being able to sleep next to him, and cuddle with him, smell him, then it will be ripped away from me.

I'm just really ready to throw in my deployment towel, and give up.